A new direction

I've been thinking, lately. Always dangerous when one is as absent-minded and easily-distracted as I am.

It's time for a change, methinks. Not a huge one, insofar as this blog is concerned. Changes here will be minimal at best (which means yes, I'll probably continue to update every month or so if I remember). Mostly minor lifestyle changes which I hope will lead to better management of my time and money, an improvement in my fitness/eating habits, and a deeper committment to becoming a better artist and graphic designer. I have been influenced in part by other blogs by close friends as far as this particular decision goes; these thoughts have been percolating for a long time and a string of recent events (as well as these blogs) have given me the motivation to begin.

I'm going to explain what I have in mind for improving, but first I must give a bit of background. This is something I should have done when I began this blog, but neglected to do in favor of letting the artwork speak for itself. So an introduction to the oddity that is myself (if a bit belated).

• I am a 22 year old graphic design senior at Johnson & Wales University. For the first 3 years of my education at JWU, I went to classes, did the work, and went home, making a few friends here and there. As a commuter, I had no real ties to the campus and no real urge to stay after classes were over. I thought about getting involved, and watched what went on in the AIGA (the organization for design professionals) group from the sidelines in my Junior year. This year I chose to join my school's AIGA chapter and finally become involved. I wish I had done it sooner.
• Continuing in the vein of school involvement, I've also joined the newly formed blog club, recently christened "linkBAIT." Not only am I the secretary, but I am also a graphic designer and content writer for the blog we will be posting. This is going to be quite a bit of work.
  
• For a little over four years, I was in an on-again/off-again emotionally abusive relationship. It was occasionally physically abusive as well. It was not a good time in my life and I lost friends because of it. I nearly lost myself as well. For the last two years I have been slowly rebuilding my tattered self-esteem. If not for a few very close friends, I might not have had any left at all. I've alternated between hiding from and fighting against depression since I was 16; it is time to take hiding out of the equation.
  
• This past June I was introduced to a man I'll call D. We met through facebook (no judging!) via a mutual acquaintance who thought we had a lot in common. D and I talked for a month or so, and then decided to meet and see what happened. (We only live 25 miles apart)
  We met for dinner and talked nonstop; for nearly a month after that we hung out on a weekly basis, sometimes several times a week. In August we decided to start dating officially and have been together ever since. D loves comic books, video games, and art. He's very family-centric and loyal to his friends; he makes me laugh and feel like I could actually be a better person sooner rather than later. I love D very much.
  
• I am not a religious person. I was raised to be a Roman Catholic, went through my Confirmation and everything, but these days I attend church for weddings and funerals only. And fortunately there have been very few of those in the 7 years since then. I like to fancy myself an Agnostic of sorts; it's comforting to believe there's a big omnipresent force in the sky that watches over us humans, but I don't think I have the right to ask it for help. Now please don't misunderstand me here, this is only my personal opinion and I'm not attacking anyone else's beliefs, I feel everyone has the right to choose what they believe. Quite frankly I feel selfish asking a mysterious ethereal being for help; I'm sure it has better things to do than help me pass a test or get a job. Mostly the thought of it serves to remind me that the best person to help me is myself, and that my life is what I make of it. Right now my life could be much more, and I am working towards enrichment.
  

Right. That's enough of that nonsense. As far as my plans go, my number one goal is to be moved out of my house by July. This will probably not happen, but it is something to work towards and look forward to. D has been unhappy lately with his fitness level and is going to go on runs, starting tomorrow morning. I was most distressed to learn that D, who is more than a foot taller than myself, is only 30lbs heavier than I am. D is not what anyone would call overweight; he's quite lean. I, on the other hand, am getting pudgier and lazier as the years go by. We talked about it tonight, and when I am down there on the weekends we're going to go on walks together (he has a very nice neighborhood). I've been trying to motivate myself to lose weight and exercise more for months. For nearly a year I went to belly dancing classes on a regular basis and was able to lose about 9 pounds and regain a good amount of stamina. I had to give it up 10 weeks ago when I began this trimester; with 6 classes, a part time job, and 2 different clubs I literally had no time to go. My weight has since gone back up thanks both to holiday cookies and a lack of energy once my school requirements for the day are taken care of.

I've also been thinking of starting soccer again. My Environmental Science professor has been talking for the last few weeks about an indoor team that he's gotten together. They play on wednesday nights on a turf field. In the spring he's going to hold 6 or 7 am practices on sundays at Winslow park for a men's team he's on; he's already said I'd be welcome to join if I wanted, they're always looking for more people. Winslow park is literally a ten minute walk from my house. There is no good reason for me not to do it (aside from reinjuring my knees and ankles, but you only live once, damn it).

To improve my health, I have finally taken my grandmother's advice and begun taking vitamins. I take a multivitamin and a Vitamin C supplement every morning with a glass of milk at breakfast. I stopped drinking soda nearly a year ago, as caffeine was doing terrible things to my body and my sleeping habits. I have tried to eat better, but that is a struggle as I love food dearly and can't really stop myself from mindless snacking when I'm only a little hungry, but feel like I should be chewing. So far the only improvements that I have been able to note are in my health and my teeth; since I started taking the vitamins I haven't gotten sick (despite sleeping in the same bed as D when he's got a terrible, horrible cold), and my teeth have actually gotten a bit whiter. The caffeine stained them yellow, and now they are not nearly so horrifying to look at. If I am honest with myself, my face is also much less puffy than it used to be, now that there is little to no caffeine keeping me bloated.

My time and money management are horrible. Some days I'm really on the ball and everything that needs to be done is done. Then there are days like today, where this entire blog post (which could have been done later) is being done now in lieu of a final project due tomorrow afternoon (technically today as I write this). My money management is HORRENDOUS. I hate to wait for anything if I want it right that second, which I suppose is a trait of my generation, but still. I am in a good amount of debt, which is only going to get infinitely worse after graduation thanks to student loans. I make enough money to have paid these bills off several times over but I continue to pay back a bit and then spend more than I've sent off in payment. On top of this I have now added my own cellphone plan as a measure of independence; I won't be living in this house much longer and it's unfair to expect my parents to pay for my phone after I've left. I've also had a social life for the first time in ages; for most of high school I really only hung out frequently with one person and he had no friends for us to go out with, and my friends hated him so I just didn't go out. Now that I can and do go out, I spend my money just as much as before, but on different things. I need to sit down and give myself a budget. The only trouble is that where I work, the hours are uncertain and you never know exactly how much you'll be able to bring in each week, which is severely limiting.

As far as the blog goes, I will be posting not only artwork, but design work as well, and updating you all on what I happen to be doing in school at the time, or progress with life changes/what have you. Since I am diversifying my life a bit, I'll be doing the same to the blog. So here's to new beginnings!